Wednesday, August 1, 2007

The Great Disappearing Act

Blog from MySpace.

Current mood: depressed
Category: Writing and Poetry

The Final Chapter, The Final Blog
The Great Disappearing Act

07-29-07 (02:55)
I'm neither coming nor going
Like the waves in the sea
An endless ocean of glass
The window through which we gaze
To watch the time pass by
Never knowing uncertainty
The bottom's there
Even if we'll never see it
There's and end to everything
So even if we're drown out by the questions
The answers are there
At the very bottom of everything.

Time And Again
07-31-07 (22:04) (it's been a long time since I've named a poem)
I'm so tired of the headaches
The earaches
The sound
I'm fed up with toothaches
And waking to find my teeth on the ground
The heartache's taken it's toll
And I've paid my dues time and again
So here I'll tell you
So you'll know it's over
At the toll of the clock tower
And the chime of the bell
Don't call me back this time!
You've never returned my calls before
You couldn't prove your words true
Anymore than I could prove I didn't love you
But I've had enough
And it's going down in a blaze of glory
A magnificent glow
Burning bridges in the midnight moonlight
You'll know it's done
When you see the blaze so great
Even from your distant perch
You'll know it's done
You've failed to prove your words
And this is how you'll know it's done!

I'm tired of being so tired
Running myself
Wearing down and out
I'm tired of being worn out
So undress yourself from me
And find some other heart to wear
You've been naked and cold for so long
So long!
My heart has broken away from you
So far away!
Shattered by the chill of your ice-cold, frozen love
So distant
So silent
And so unwilling
So distant
So silent
I'm so glad...
To be moving on from you
I'm so glad...
No more hurting
I'll be moving on from you.
This time it's time
And I won't miss it again. (22:31)

08-01-07 (01:33)
You're the calm before the storm
And I can't take it anymore
Just hit already
Hit
And tear me to F*cking bits!
You're doing it anyway
So just get it
Over and done with
You have nothing to fear
Cause when you're done I won't be here
So just blow away every part of me
That ever loved every part of you


08-01-07 (13:32)
Burning on the inside
Quiet on the outside
Not so sure ... what to do
I just let go
And it's all over the nightly news

You were the first
And I'm making you the last
If you can take that
Take that!
If you can take that
Take that promise you your grave
It'll never happen again

You missed out on what could've been
The greatest romance you were ever in
And I'm just letting you know that...
I'm just letting you know that it's over

Questions burning on my tongue
Answers dancing on my brain
Next time
Oh (what am I talking about?)
Next time
I'll make sure she doesn't have a problem
Opening her mouth and forming words
Dialing a number
Answering a phone
Standing up for what she loves
Next time
Oh (what am I talking about?)
Next time
There surely won't be one

You missed out on what could've been
The greatest romance you were ever in
And I'm just letting you know
I'm just letting you know that it's over

Burning on the inside
Quiet on the outside
Not so sure .... what to do
I just let go
Yeah
I just let go of you.

08-01-07 (14:18)
(trying and failing to take a more accurate tone)
Burning on the inside
Quiet on the outside
Not so sure ... what to do
I just let go
I just let go of you

She's been tell me
That I know
How she feels about it
And she said it sounds
Like I've finally made up my mind

It's been so quiet lately
So quiet all the time

You were the first
And I'm making you the last
Take that promise to your grave
I'll never happen again

I want someone cool and calm
Quite composed not overwhelmed
And when she can't take it
She's not afraid to ask for help
She doesn't have a problem talking
Even when she's far away
And she'll stand up to her parents
For this love she's not afraid


08-01-07 (14:38)
(going serious again, but failing to express in the end, like I start off on the right foot, but then get lost and distracted somewhere)
I really feel it on the inside
I really don't want to let go
But what am I holding on to?
What am I holding on to?
Heavy, something's fallen onto me
Weighing me down
Responsibility.
You said you had to prove me wrong
And I gave you your chance
I wanted you to win
But you can't
You've just proven me right again
You can't talk
I don't know why
But I know I can't stay silent
I have to stand up and fight
Someone out there wants what you've stolen from me
My heart, it's a valued treasure
And you can't seem to appreciate
I guarded it so well and gratefully handed it away
To someone who cared
But you're not her
And I need it back now
I won't be used as a backup plan to fall in love

08-01-07 (14:40)
Get busy living
Or get busy dying
I'm not waiting around for this

Currently listening :
Cover Your Eyes
By Sullivan
Release date: By 05 June, 2007
0 Comments - 0 Kudos

It won't last forever (Don't miss out) "Setting the Stage"

Blog from MySpace.

Current mood: depressed
Category: Writing and Poetry

Okay, so to catch up for the past month....

07-02-07 (01:30)

Oh I'm so tired
Having to watch the hero get the girl
Why can't they make the Real World
More like the life we know?
Cause I don't see the ending happily
I just see a nice guy
Trying to be (strong)
Getting strung along
And strangled by a leash
Like tug-o-war
But I'm fighting with a tree
Please
Just come out and say it
I hope you get
Everything you've ever wanted
But why can't you tell me
That I'm just your sturdy ground
When you fail to find anything else

07-03-07 (02:11)

I've decided
I'll never be lonely again
Never again
I'll accustom myself
To being on my own
And once I've accomplished the task
I'll never be lonely again
After that
I'll never be lonely
Only all alone!
But never lonely again
Never again.

Like taking the strongest drug
Over time
The dose isn't strong enough
And I'll phase it out
I'll where myself down
Like a pencil whose lead's run out
I'll scratch it all down
And carve it all out
Leaving hints in the softer stones
As to how I'll be living alone
And once I've accomplished the task
I'll never bee lonely again
I'll never be lonely
After that
I'll be on my own
Only all alone
But I'll never be lonely again
Never again

07-16-07 (01:17)

So call the bet on the weather report
There's been a disturbance in the news
This signals growing weaker
And all I can hear is how you're ready for...

Now the static's found its way in
Disrupting the peace you've been trying to find
The sound of silence
Has plucked my eyes from their sockets
And now it's singing me goodnight.

What is there left to prove?
Can you still question my doubt
I told you
I'll believe it when I see it
Or when I hear that sound

Now the static's found its way in
Disrupting the peace you've been trying to find
The sound of silence
Has plucked my eyes from their sockets
And now it's singing me goodnight.

How strong is the power of love?
A bond like nothing else could hold
A bond not easily broken
But silence...
Too bad you're feeling so alone!
Too bad Too bad
And I'm sorry
I know exactly how it feels
In time I escaped its shackles
But here you are
Trying to chain me again!
And I'm so sorry...
For you.

07-19-07 (13:18)
Maybe I'm not so afraid now
Dying alone
Alone isn't so bad anymore.

07-26-07 (18:13)
I forget she's an artist

07-26-07 (18:17)

I've become afraid of making mistakes
My writings have always been honest
Truth from my heart
I don't know what's true anymore.
How can I accuse?
Who has done wrong?
What have I made up?
What's true?
I forget.

07-26-07 (23:31)

I've forgotten
But I'll make it up to you
I've been blinded
And I've forgotten
How to open my eyes
Filling up with spiders
Howling moon tonight
My eyes are wired wide
And all I can see through these webs
Darkened skies
The vulgarities and
All the lies!

07-29-07 (02:55)
........
07-31-07 (22:04)
........
08-01-07 (01:33)
........

Well, I apologize for these next two. They are rather stupid and expressing parts of what I wanted to express, but not everything. I was listening to Cute Is What We Aim For at the time that I wrote them earlier today, and so I had this poppy emo tune in my head which did not allow me to express the wholeness of how I felt in the seriousness that I felt it. Anyway...

08-01-07 (13:32)

Burning on the inside
Quiet on the outside
Not so sure ... what to do
I just let go
And it's all over the nightly news

You were the first
And I'm making you the last
If you can take that
Take that!
If you can take that
Take that promise you your grave
It'll never happen again

You missed out on what could've been
The greatest romance you were ever in
And I'm just letting you know that...
I'm just letting you know that it's over

Questions burning on my tongue
Answers dancing on my brain
Next time
Oh (what am I talking about?)
Next time
I'll make sure she doesn't have a problem
Opening her mouth and forming words
Dialing a number
Answering a phone
Standing up for what she loves
Next time
Oh (what am I talking about?)
Next time
There surely won't be one

You missed out on what could've been
The greatest romance you were ever in
And I'm just letting you know
I'm just letting you know that it's over

Burning on the inside
Quiet on the outside
Not so sure .... what to do
I just let go
Yeah
I just let go of you.

I was trying to rewrite this with all the ideas that I wanted to express, but failed again. So here are the results of that failure.

08-01-07 (14:18)
Burning on the inside
Quiet on the outside
Not so sure ... what to do
I just let go
I just let go of you

She's been tell me
That I know
How she feels about it
And she said it sounds
Like I've finally made up my mind

It's been so quiet lately
So quiet all the time

You were the first
And I'm making you the last
Take that promise to your grave
I'll never happen again

I want someone cool and calm
Quite composed not overwhelmed
And when she can't take it
She's not afraid to ask for help
She doesn't have a problem talking
Even when she's far away
And she'll stand up to her parents
For this love she's not afraid

I then tried not rewriting, but that failed as well. So here is that failure. I just couldn't express all that I wanted to. I keep going of to different things. It's like I start off on the right foot, but then get lost and distracted somewhere.

08-01-07 (14:38)

I really feel it on the inside
I really don't want to let go
But what am I holding on to?
What am I holding on to?
Heavy, something's fallen onto me
Weighing me down
Responsibility.
You said you had to prove me wrong
And I gave you your chance
I wanted you to win
But you can't
You've just proven me right again
You can't talk
I don't know why
But I know I can't stay silent
I have to stand up and fight
Someone out there wants what you've stolen from me
My heart, it's a valued treasure
And you can't seem to appreciate
I guarded it so well and gratefully handed it away
To someone who cared
But you're not her
And I need it back now
I won't be used as a backup plan to fall in love

08-01-07 (14:40)
Get busy living
Or get busy dying
I'm not waiting around for this

Currently listening :
Cover Your Eyes
By Sullivan
Release date: By 05 June, 2007
0 Comments - 0 Kudos