Truthless Heroes (a random thought on fandom and heaven)

I recently posted two comments on a Patreon post. It made me think that I've been sharing my thoughts in comments on other people's posts, but sometimes I'd like to remember my own thoughts, and keep them here for me--and anyone who might care to read them.

In this Patreon post--a podcast--Andrew Schwab of Project 86 was talking with a long-time supporter. They briefly touched on how famous people have to learn how to interact with strangers who know them (i.e. fans).

my comments:

Describing the "meeting a fan" experience is so interesting. I've been trying to wrap my brain around it for years... If I were to meet so-and-so... what would I say? They don't know me. I don't know them. I'm emotionally invested in their music, their words, their voice, the characters they play on the screen, the characters they wrote into a book, etc.--in love with who I imagine them to be.
How would I connect with them and express how their influence has affected my life? Because they don't know me... and I don't know them... I've just made up a narrative, creating heroes in my head.
I want to get to know them for real... but there's no time for that. We can't be friends and go hang out.

This thought keeps coming to mind, so I'm back to add on to my previous comment. After reading C.S. Lewis' The Great Divorce, I began to re-imagine heaven as a neighborhood where my neighbors are all my best friends and family. Likewise, all of their neighbors are their best friends, and somehow, we are just eternally surround by all our best friends, family, and favorite people, etc...
I know that's silly. What does it say about me that my idea of heaven is being surround by people that I love?

Judgement for Jonah (a poem)

Written 2022-06-20 (0739) without a title.

They all tell me

I should've hailed a different bus

On the road to Ninevah

Storm in the clouds

And a beast in the deep

Tail tucked between my legs

In the cabin, fast asleep

Be it sand or be it sea

This desert's gonna swallow me

Remembering Dad

Dad passed peacefully in his sleep the morning of May the First, 2022.

What one, of any infinite number of lessons I could possibly share from Dad's life might be worth sharing today?

Live every day, planning for all the projects that can make life "any better." From the mundane to the impossible, from breakfast with friends, to cruises with those you love, to 21-day recovery plans--live your life with love so that if it were any better, you couldn't stand it.

Instead of a traditional funeral, we held a simple Celebration of Life.  Friends and family shared some beautiful comments, but many others were not able to attend.  Sadly, the ceremony was not recorded.  I am compiling this post to share the typed words and notes from the ceremony, and including the two videos we do have.

Thank you for your love, and prayers, and for sharing with us in this time of grief.  While we're saddened that he is gone, we know he is breathing easy with Jesus, and we will see him again.

Book Review: Prince Lander and the Dragon War by S.D. Smith

Prince Lander and the Dragon War by S.D. Smith
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

I love S.D. Smith's books, and usually love them even more after reading a second time. However, the Tales of Old Natalia books are always difficult for me to review, in a similar way that it is difficult to review The Legend of Korra without comparing it to Avatar: The Last Airbender. So I plan to approach this review from three angles:
1. Standalone plot and story
2. The lore in the greater Green Ember series.
3. Narration (Audiobook)
So let's dig into Prince Lander and the Dragon War.
(please understand, I've only read this once so far, and this is probably the most critical review I've written for one of S.D. Smith's books)

First, the plot and story, and how well Prince Lander and the Dragon War stands on it's own merits. S.D. Smith sticks to his usual writing style of filling the story with emotion and adrenaline. This has worked well enough in some of his other books, but I've always viewed it as one of Smith's weaknesses. This is usually my reasoning behind 4-star ratings for books that I find myself loving. I think Prince Lander suffers more than other books in the series due to lack of character development as we jump from one adrenaline-fueled jaunt to the next. There are a lot of questions established as this story charges heedlessly into the fray, but few of them are answered because Smith doesn't spend much time in those character driven moments. Who is Hollie Grimble and does she have any significance? She could have easily become a love interest that could lead to a marriage bringing peace between the factions... but no. She doesn't seem to have any significance. Who are Lander's brothers? I just don't care enough about them. Why is everyone so quick to turn on King Whitson? I guess because he made them all settle right next door to the dragons--again, WHY? Who are the Drekkers (I know this is explained, but is it really)? Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed the Drekkers; I just didn't understand their role. Oath sworn to the king, but we won't honor it or pick sides, but we'll pick your side...
In a sense, the plot suffers from a "chosen one" trope. Prince lander spends the entire book trying to unravel and bring about prophecies about the star sword, in essence, trying to make himself the chosen one. There's a sense that all depends on Lander, and despite injuries and overwhelming odds, nothing would succeed without him.
There's also (annoyingly) a new catchphrase for this book: "Defend all. All defend." While I love Blackstar's oath, this is the one book where it somewhat makes sense to have another catchphrase--Blackstar's not here and King Whitson's trying to build a community. I still think it's unnecessary, and the oath would have been fine.

Second analysis: Lore in the overall Green Ember series.
My overall thoughts... think Solo: A Star Wars Story--it's telling a story that is legendary and mysterious within the lore of it's own universe... and then it fails to deliver that legend. Without spoilers, I think there could have been more to how the dragons ended up under the lake at First Warren. I'll go back to The Green Ember and my review of The Black Star of Kingston--these are supposed to be stories that Picket and Heather grew up listening to. Picket idolizes Blackstar and his devotion in protecting King Whitson, but they spent all of 5 seconds together. Yes Blackstar shows up in this book, but he's never with King Whitson.
After The Wreck and Rise of Whitson Mariner, I thought Massie would have made a better idol for Picket, as he never left Lander's side--but then he disappeared in this book.
Sadly this book just doesn't fit into the established lore of the series. Sure, names and hints and little Easter eggs are scattered throughout the book, but I'm sad to say it's not a satisfying, cohesive tale.

Finally, the narration by Eric Fritzius.
I love Joel Clarkson's narration of the main Green Ember series, but I've always struggled to enjoy Eric Fritzius's narration of the Tales of Old Natalia and the Green Archer series. He does well enough with voice variations and accents, but most of the time I just imagine a character sounding differently, especially in this book. This is probably because all the truly old characters (King Whitson, Blackstar, Massie, etc.) don't sound old enough, which makes Lander sound too old. I just didn't enjoy the narration. The Drekker voices are fun, same as Jimmy Docker was.

At the end of the read, this book was a lot of hype, and I'm surprised I'm giving it 4 stars. I'm tempted to only give it 3. I'll read again soon with my daughter, and maybe it'll grow on me. I'm sorry, I really wanted to love this book.

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Two Songs for the World Today

Wow. Thinking of problems today, and why we can’t get people into one room to share simple discussions. (Last week, someone commented that you can only lead a horse so close to water before you end up with a drowned horse.) We need connection so much, and yet no one is willing to enter the room (or arena as Brené Brown calls it, currently reading Dare to Lead). I just want to quit and give up trying, but am I doing this for me, or for the people I hope to get into the room?

Then it hit me. Two songs came to mind. The first song I thought of is the reason people won't enter the room. The second song that came to mind later signifies getting people into the room to discuss the problem.

First song: "So Selfish It's Funny"
(lyrics below, but if playing the video, you may want to turn the volume down)

Song: So Selfish It's Funny
Band: Showbread
Album: No Sir, Nihilism Is Not Practical
Lyrics:

Someday they'll write a book about you
Because you're so selfish it's funny
So self-absorbed, this thunderous horde
Of you, you, you
So self-absorbed, this thunderous horde
Of you, you, you

Yeah, I'd love you
But you love yourself
And you'd love me
But I love myself

So tense are these nerves in any instance
Teeth snap and a toe taps the dirt
Cry like a baby and see if then maybe the others will cherish your hurt
Never you see a cry or a plea
Consider another or first
Know this is YOUR world
The harsh words you have hurled
Recall you are the one in need worse

Yeah, I'd love you
But you love yourself
And you'd love me
But I love myself
Yeah, I'd love you
But you love yourself

Ignoring you, I dance, oh I do
Through magnificent realms, quite divine
Stopping to see my face smiling at me
For this is my life and my time

Yeah, I'd love you
But you love yourself
And you'd love me
But I love myself
Yeah, I'd love you
But you love yourself
And we'd serve you
But we serve ourselves

What an arduous task, it proves such a feat to be only one of a kind
Through the scenery slips through the spaces we meet
Press forward and leave me behind

What a child you are, for you look just like me
Looking out for number one, I'm all that I have and all that I see
Saved by the grace of the Son
So shall we deny?
And rot as we die?
As I write a book about me
My noble wealth of serving myself
I am so selfish it's funny

Giving up to start again

This past week has been rough.

• Monday I told my boss I planned to do something in a month and he said he approved of the idea.
• Tuesday I was crushed due to lack of participation in a project I've been working on, which ultimately throws off the plans I proposed on Monday (hard to host a special event when nobody wants to participate).
• Wednesday, I had the opportunity to discuss my project with a coach in order to iron out kinks and hopefully, eventually, push the project to a larger audience. My coach was in a van full of people on the road, distracted, and the call dropped several times before it devolved into a text message conversation with no productive outcome.
• Thursday, I felt so defeated, I didn't bother participating in my own project event. I didn't even bother checking in with the people that normally participate to see if it went well, or even happened at all. I was ready to throw in the towel.

I've been listening to the book "Dare to Lead" by Brené Brown, and Tuesday, I came across the section where she shares a story by Retired Air Force Colonel Dede Halfhill. The story touched on exactly what I was feeling and struggling with all week--exhaustion and loneliness.

I loved the way Dr. Brown narrated the story in the book, so I went looking for a clip of that exact audio on YouTube. I didn't find it, but I did find a couple videos with different tellings of the same story. 

edit: I should add that this list is in the order I found these videos. I've been bouncing around rewatching them to absorb the story, and I'd probably recommend watching them in chronological order: 2010 TED Talk, 2012 TED Talk, The Art of Language and Connection, and finally the Interview with Col Halfhill (retired). Now back to my regularly scheduled chaos...

First, here's the story. A weaker telling, but as close to the book as I could find:

This story revealed to me that the exhaustion I'm facing is LONELINESS. I feel alone in my efforts. I feel alone because I can't express my feelings with anyone due to the mandate of sterile, politically correct language. I lack friends. I feel alone at work. I feel alone at home. I don't know how to connect with others, or who to connect with. But this story tells me I'm not alone in those feelings.

In my search for other versions of the story, I found a full interview with Col Halfhill (retired) that covered The Man in the Arena quote by Theodore Roosevelt and how she met Brené Brown and shared the story that ended up in the book. I watched shortened clips of the interview out of order, but here's the full interview from start to finish. Thank you Josh for starting The HeroFront Podcast. I wish I had found this nine months ago:

This interview mentioned Brené Brown's TED Talks, so I went digging for those.

First there was Brené Brown's 2010 TED talk on Vulnerability:

And finally, Brené Brown's 2012 TED Talk on Shame (I think this one is stronger than the 2010 talk):

So now I'm back to reassessing the value of my project. Ultimately, I have to remember it's not about me. As I prepare to share some of these videos with my coworkers, and open up about my struggles, I drafted up the following to describe why I continue pressing forward:

For every one of me that's struggling to get people involved, there are hundreds of you who could potentially benefit from one of these discussions. So I can't give up.

Ultimately, the potential benefit this might bring far outweighs my frustrations and disappointments.

Accordingly, God reminded me this morning that He is bigger than my unmet expectations.

Also, just to end this in the key of AWESOME! Col Halfhill's story reminds me of this amazing song:

Jars of Clay, "Work" from the album Good Monsters (which is truly incredible, if you haven't heard it).

Another highlight from Good Monsters is the track "Oh My God":

And I'm done. Thanks.

The Tales of Old Natalia - Bear the Flame

So very excited by the mail today! (Even though my head is severely congested and I'm actually feeling rather miserable--I'm getting over a cold.)

Today, arrived a package bearing a golden sticker.

"Bear the Flame" it exclaims.

Here I have demonstrated the proper way to handle the golden stickers before recycling the package:

Oh! And this book was also included in the package:

You may want to check it out. Right, now. Before it's too late.

Tales of Old Natalia, Book 3: Prince Lander and the Dragon War

And if you haven't read the first two books (or 9 other related Green Ember books), you can pick up The Tales of Old Natalia, Book 1: The Black Star of Kingston for just 99 cents on Kindle, or get The Green Ember audiobook for free on S. D. Smiths website:

Operation Black Star Rising: Uncle Sam Needs YOU!

Here's my review of The Black Star of Kingston, recently copied from Audible to Goodreads:

The Black Star of Kingston by S.D. Smith
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Stories of bravery and stories to make us brave

I thought I had reviewed this last year (2019), but the review isn't here (Audible.com), so I guess it didn't save properly. So here I am again.
I was really excited for this book, but ended up a bit disappointed for various reasons.
First, coming off of Joel Clarkson's narration of The Green Ember, Eric Fritzius just didn't give the audiobook the same life. Compared to Joel Clarkson's narration, this started out sounding like a text-to-speech engine for me. The narration moves too quickly and is mostly robotic with little variation (excluding Jimmi Docker, who stands out in my memory).
The next disappointment was not so much in the story, but in the presentation. In The Green Ember, the tales of Blackstar and Whitson Mariner are referenced as stories that were told over and over for the children. So I guess I was expecting and looking forward to something that was more episodic adventures, or perhaps 5-minute-story type chapters, rather than a long flowing story, that doesn't present itself as much of a bedtime story. Then the last piece to this disappointment, is that this seems to be the one adventure of Blackstar and King Whitson together, where The Green Ember makes it sound like Blackstar and the king were inseparable and had many adventures for many years.
So that's all for my nitpicking.
Other than the narration, and the story not being quite what I expected, it was a great story. Much shorter than The Green Ember, and less child-focused, but that doesn't make it any less child-friendly.
At only about one third the length of The Green Ember, the character development is quick, but strong, and the only place where the overall story suffers from the compression is that it could focus a bit more on the virtues of being brave, as that seems to be the legend behind the tale. The character lessons on bravery are subtle at best.
It focuses on the settling of Natalia and their first encounter with the birds of prey. You meet Blackstar the gardener, who wants to mine for coal, and King Whitson who has not been raised to be a king and must learn to come to grips with the demands of ruling and caring for the rabbits in his community. This introduces the origins of Blackstar's "My place beside you" oath; the creed of all rabbits loyal to King Whitson and his line.
I've listened to the Audible version twice now and just finished reading the Kindle version with our 7-year-old daughter. She loves this series (overall Green Ember series), and I'm very excited to be able to share it with her, because I love the series too. As I've said for other reviews in the series, I think most of these books deserve a solid 4 stars, but many I bump up to 5 because they're such an enjoyable ride, despite their flaws. The Black Star of Kingston sits solidly at a 4 in my eyes, especially the audio version.

[2022 Update]
And yet I still feel bad marking it down a star, because I love S. D. Smith and the series he's created.
I'm really excited to continue the Tales of Old Natalia with Book 3: Prince Lander and the Dragon War.
It comes out next month, so go pick up the series and get caught up!


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The Coming of "Prince Lander and the Dragon War"

Well, S.D. Smith has finished writing the 10th book in the Green Ember universe, and I'm stoked.

Pre-order your copy of Prince Lander and the Dragon War (Tales of Old Natalia, Book 3): https://sdsmith.com/store/

 

 

 

I'm writing this post for three reasons:

1. S.D. Smith has a contest for the release of the new book, and I didn't read all the details, but you have to create your own post about the series and you can read more details on Mr. Smith's blog.

2. So that all of my many zeros of readers will know how much I love the Green Ember series, I'm including in this post my 3-year-old review of the very first book, The Green Ember.

3. Finally, my nine-year-old daughter colored these pictures when she was seven! I've been a terrible father, and never shared them with S.D. Smith on Facebook like I was supposed to. So here they are:

And here's my review of The Green Ember. Don't let the 4 stars fool you, we truly love this series. I have re-read this book at least four times after my initial review, one of those times being when I began reading the entire series to my daughter.

The Green Ember by S.D. Smith
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

(Original review was posted 17 January 2019 on Audible. Updated some comments during my second listen in July 2019. Let a second listen within a year tell you how much I've enjoyed this series, even if I only gave it 4 stars.)

I was a little slow to get into this story, but perhaps it's just adjusting to a new narrator or getting to know the new characters in an audiobook. I can't say I was terribly fond of the reader. Sometimes his accents were far too strong and difficult to understand, other times his accents and pronunciations were inconsistent. For example a character with a gruff, raspy voice would sometimes lose the growl and occasionally have a much more normal voice. Overall, I think he did a decent job reading and he certainly has a wide range of voices and accent variations at his command to personify the different characters. There were just a few that needed to be toned down a bit. (On my second listen through, I still agree some of the accents should be toned down, but overall, I think I'm more able to appreciate the narration. He really does do a great job bringing these characters to life.)
The story starts off with a brief moment of peace before quickly throwing the characters into chase after chase. As soon as you think things are calming down, they're sprinting again. Even when the action lets up and allows you to catch your breath, the story builds a rich lore with glimpses of the histories of the world and characters. The running seemed a bit excessive early on, and started to lose my interest, but the middle smoothed the pace out and it all ended with an exhilarating dash to the finish.
There were certainly some things that didn't make much sense to me and although I tried listening to chapters over to see if I had missed something, I ended up just accepting it and moving on and usually things eventually became clear. One of these was the idea of the Mended Wood. At first mention it was given such weight by the character describing it and while the importance passes to the characters in the book, the description fell flat for me and I felt somewhat uninterested in the heroes' cause. It wasn't until a good while later when more history and lore was revealed that the idea truly started to feel important to me.
Another characterization that bugged me was Pickett's anger. Although I understand he's going through a lot and emotions are bound to run high, his constant and irrational anger seemed to be a crutch the author used to make him seem young or flawed. I still don't understand why he was angry all the time unless I'm supposed to just perceive him as an angsty teenager.
Everything seemed to come together very well at the end, and it was very exciting. Definitely ended on a high note.
One thing my imagination did while listening that I found very interesting was how I visualized the characters in my head. Although I generally visualized the characters as humanoid rabbits on two feet, as seen on the book cover, throughout the whole book, whenever characters were running, I instinctively imagined them on all fours. I continued this visualization instinctively all the way until some point near the end of the book when a description stood out to me to more clearly express a character was running on two legs rather than all fours and it almost diminished the effect of the movement for me. Just an interesting thing, I thought. I think I'd like to continue imagining the characters as running on all fours as it makes their movements seem more graceful and powerful as opposed to two large rabbit feet flapping around awkwardly like trying to run in diving flippers. (Guess I could always imagine Officer Hopps from Zootopia)

Overall an enjoyable read. I'm looking forward to continuing the journey in the Ember series.

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Don't forget to pre-order Prince Lander and the Dragon War!

 

Book Review: Deep Work (by Cal Newport)

Deep Work: Rules for Focused Success in a Distracted World by Cal Newport
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

I love the concepts presented in this book. As such, I probably shouldn't be here writing a review (others have already written reviews better than what I could write).
All I need is a day-by-day guide and a coach to keep me on track building good focus habits for a year.
Speaking of a day-by-day guide to coach me into focus, my biggest critique for this book is with pacing. I don't know if it was the narration of the audio book, or maybe the length of sections and chapters in the book. The narrator isn't bad, but he just couldn't hold my attention (the irony). I can't say that this is entirely the narrator's fault. It could be the writing, it could be that I've been tired or distracted while trying to listen. Whatever the case, I found myself constantly jumping back 5-10 minutes because I had lost track of the point.

I don't need this book to convince me that I (and all of society) are chronically distracted. What I do need, is a guide to help the chronically distracted learn to focus, and I feel like this book misses that mark. Cal presents a lot of great points and ideas, but could have made them easier to digest and put into practice. That is to say, if I need to have deep focus in order to read your book and start practicing deep focus basics... well, I'm already failing, aren't I?
As I was jotting down notes on my highlighted bookmarks, I found several well written summaries of the book and concepts online. I'd start there.

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